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Sick! SICK!

I am sorry dear reader/s of Life at Ward's, I am unable to report activity from the frontline today due to my being off sick. I am sure that the good people at Ward's have nothing but sympathy for me in my weakened and vulnerable position. I can report that, if I continue to feel as semi-perky as I do at 19:55hrs at 07:00 hours, I will indeed be travelling across the Howardians to Ward's HQ. It is quite difficult to type this blog at home when there are screaming babies and babbling 6-Year Olds and pots and pans crashing in the kitchen. It seems much easier to block out Mr C and Mr R blethering on about 6-burner oven ranges and serve over counters. Peculiar. So what's been wrong with me? Well my snot producing gland has been working overtime to ensure a decent flow of mucus has made it onto a full roll of bogroll. My head... ACHES like billy oh and I basically feel like I have been hit by a lorry (speaking as someone who has actually been hit by a lorry I can attest to this). I was just dropping off after the joy of schoolruns and feeding times and all the rest of domestic life's blissful little tasks when my other half, who was going to drop off present's at her friend's house came running back in the house screaming at me that someone had just driven into the back of the Vectra. I leaped out of bed cursing and went to the window expecting to see the SRI with it's hindquarters where it's rear doors used to be butr all looked well. I went down to the car and was met my an expectant posse of my other half's family who reported that a man in a focus had grazed the rear bumper while parking behind us. When confronted by my other half, the man said sorry and walked off briskly. I went back inside and my other half went away seething.